ITS SO NICE TO BE BACK

I have been so busy for the past couple of months ,and I am so glad to be back at blogging.Here are a few things that happened when i was not blogging.Studied my ass off for my final year degree exams.Went back to Maldives.Had lots and lots of fun with my family.Got fresh new visa and came back.One more thing, I watched a movie called Before Sunset,which pissed me off coz only after watching the movie did i realise that I havent seen Before Sunrise,which means that i have only seen the sequel.
As soon as I landed here, I got a call from this lady saying that I have my interview the very next day.Well,how i carried myself in this interview will decide whether I get selected to do a diploma in special education specializing in autism spectrum disorder. Isnt it just amazing,I have been trying to get a chance to do this for quite sometime now.
I have noticed that other bloggers have mentioned that 7.7.7 is a very special date.And all I have got to say is that it is really an auspicious day for me too.As it turned out I got selected to do the autism course.I am so excited,the reality is slowly sinking in.I went for the inaugration of the course yesterday.Another spectacular feature of the programme is that our lecturers hail from THE NATIONAL INSTITUTE FOR MENTAL HEALTH AND NEURO SCIENCE.I am sooooooooo happy for me.You may find this article kinda boring coz its all about me.Forgive me but I just have to let it out.I will get back writing about the crappy side of life some other time.Bye for now.

AND FINALLY THE DAY HAS ARRIVED

I have tried so hard and so long to ignore it.But now there is nowhere to hide .Yes,the time has come.I have to part ways with my most beloved thing.I cant believe i have to let it go.Goodbye my freedom.So long my independence.I am gonna miss you so much.Though i leave for maldives tommorow ,i will never forget you.Gone are the days when i enjoyed the idea of being alone.Gone are the days that i got lost in crowds ,and just absolutely loving the fact that they had no idea who i was.It was a manic depressive who convinced me that being lost is an exciting thing.All the new habits that i have picked up will be weird for my relatives but i dont give a damn.I plan to catch the next flight back as soon as i go there.The clean fresh air of maldives doesnt fascinate as much as my freedom fascinates me.

A WEEK IN MY LIFE

Its amazing how much a person gets to experience in just a week 's time.Its also amazing how we got conditioned to use a word like week to describe a certain period of time.I dont even remember when i learned this word.Anyway enough about this topic.As i was saying a lot of things happened last week.A eunuch slapped my butt.It was wierd cause normally they do not disturb women . So i have come to the conclusion that it was a cross dresser who slapped my butt.What else, oh yes i was playing very loud Jimi Hendrix when our maid said she cant clean my room unless i turned down the music .And the salt was added to the injury when my mom took the maids side. I went shopping with my mom she bought flowers and a vase.She arranged the flowers in the vase and kept it next to my computer .Here comes the beautiful part she watered the flowers and the water in return gave a bath to my keyboard.Hence,i was unable to use it for a couple of days.Right now i dont have the energy to write about the depressing stuff cause its very depressing.

I admire Irish accent.I think its the cutest accent of them all.Now let me go back in time to understand when this particular liking started.Oh by the way its Northern Irish accent.I think it might be Daniel Day Lewis' fault.Yes I blame him for acting in In The Name Of The Father.The movie was great,he looked amazingly handsome ,and he was Irish in it.
Now the next person to be blamed is the late Phil Lynnot.Yes he is half Irish and he sang Dublin.He is also partly at fault.I know this is not a big deal,but we should always try to search for answers.We should not always look at the tip of the ice berg.

A PINCH OF ANGER ,AND A DROP OF GIDDINESS.

I think split personalities are created because of individuals like me.I just feel that I nuture all types of emotions that shouldnt be inside a single person.The hedonist in me that I constantly showoff has picked up a fight with the pessimist in me.And the worst part is that the pessimistic me refuses to vanish.I just cant support both of them.Pessimistic me is built of anger,loads and loads of resentment,and not to mention a huge amount self loathing.On the other hand the hedonist me doesnt give a damn about the daily hassles of life.It just wants to appreciate the finer things in life.I am so attached to all of my emotions that I refuse to take sides.Hence, I have no choice but to become a split personality.Now all this must sound like a whole lot of crap but I am genuinely upset.

BLOGGING IS THERAPEUTIC.

I sometimes ask myself why do i like blogging.I never had a diary or a journal before.And i never had fancied neither.I think of blogging as a holistic approach for healing ones soul.Our soul gets crushed ,hurt or disappointed on a daily basis.And there arent many options for releasing stress in a healthy way.I say blogging is therapeutic just like a person having a lot of anger locked up inside chooses boxing or wrestling as a healthy alternative to cool off. While blogging i dont hasitate loosing my inhibitions which normally restricts me from saying whats on my mind.And even better is the part where i get comments from many faceless names.And the best part is that their critcisms doesnt do any damage to my soul.Its all about the freedom of expressing my inner self.And at other times its just about blabbering until i run out of words and my mind becomes a clean white sheet of paper.There is nothing more beautiful than an empty mind.

THE BEGINNING OF A CRAPPY DAY.

I officially declare that this is the crappiest day of 2007 so far.I wish i could kick todays ass for being so god damn crappy.It all started when i woke up in the middle of the night ,and i must add that i woke up just without any reason whatsoever.Yup, i didnt have to pee or anything, i just woke up.After that all hell broke loose coz my sleep kept getting disrupted periodically, and that too without any reason.I have a teeny tiny headache i think its due to the excessive amount of resentment i have towards this existing sunday.And Led Zeppelins music aint helping at all.Its like Robert Plant is as pissed off as myself.I hate today and every thing that i set my eyes upon.I am so angry that i changed the look of my crappy blog.This is by far the most useless post i have published.

A WORLD WITHOUT LEADERS

I HAVE BEEN THINKING ,WHAT IF WE CAN GET RID OF ALL THE WORLD LEADERS.A LEADER FREE SOCIETY. I THINK IT SOUNDS RATHER APPEALING.OF COURSE MY NARCISSTIC PERSONALITY ALLOWS ME TO APPRECIATE MY IDEAS.BUT SERIOUSLY I DONT THINK THAT ANY THING BAD CAN COME OUT OF HAVING A LEADERLESS WORLD.THE WORLD WASNT DESIGNED IN A WAY THAT IT WOULD EXPLODE WITHOUT A LEADER.THERE ARE MEN ,WOMEN ,ANIMALS,PLANTS ,BUT I HAVENT SEEN AN ENTITY CALLED A LEADER WHICH WAS CREATED BY MOTHER NATURE.IT IS JUST A FICTITIOUS POSITION CREATED BY SOMEONE WHO FELT UNEASY ABOUT THE EXTENT THAT OTHERS WERE ABLE TO ENJOY LIFE.EACH ONE SHOULD STICK TO THEIR OWN RULES WHICH THEY FEEL IS ALRIGHT .NO NEED TO SPY ON OTHERS ,JUST SPEND TIME SMELLING ONES OWN GUIBURI.

MISSING MALDIVES

I CANT HELP IT ,I MISS MY COUNTRY ,MY PEOPLE ,THE FRESH AIR OF MALDIVES,EVEN THOUGH THE CAPITAL CITY IS A BIT POLLUTED,ITS WAY BETTER THAN WHERE I AM RIGHT NOW.I KNOW I WONT FEEL LIKE THIS TOMMOROW.MAYBE ITS THE WEATHER, OR IT MAYBE SOME CHEMICAL IMBALANCE OF MY BODY.I KNOW THERE ARE A LOT OF DRUGGIES,WIERDOS .POLITICAL PARTIES CAN ALSO BE FOUND IN ABUNDANCE,HEART DISEASES,PARALYSIS,DIABETICS,RISPERIDONE SWALLOWING SCHIZORPHRENICS,MORPHINE AND ACETIC ACID BOILING INTELLECTUALS ARENT RARE EITHER. ITS A CHALLENGE TO OBTAIN PROLONGED SANITY AND MENTAL FITNESS BEING A MALDIVIAN AND THATS WHAT I LOVE ABOUT MALDIVES.

I had always believed that there is no such thing as a perfect life,and that this world is also filled with various types of problems.But now i want to be more optimistic in my thinking.Its a whole different story that even though i try to stay optimistic ,the world doesnt agree with me.This world is a continnum of sorrow and joy,and we as human beings always find ourselves to be standing on some point of the line.And i must add that nobody is at fault for the pain of the other person,really each one of us has our own problems.Even in my own beautiful country called maldives ,there are various sorts of crises surrounding us.Some are waiting for democracy to come, others are happily counting the number of girls opting for burkaas, others cant think beyond the venue for having the next cup of coffee,some are amazed that black coloured eye liners have become obsolete in le cute, and so on and so forth our problems proceed. Each one has an individual capacity to think,and they cant think beyond their limits, nobody is at fault.And elsewhere in the world its the same damned process, some are anxiously waiting for the darfur conflict to get over, others are eyeing whether America is eyeing an oil well,whereas Indian government has decided that all the children studying in government schools will get an egg atleast once a day, i mean i am happy for them, dont get me wrong.Now lets see i also have my own issues, i want to be a bit taller,and i would like to know why John Mayer looks more and more like Susan Sarandon with each passing day.If i was granted a wish i will make Jon Stewart of the comedy central fame the president of the universe.Oh, i almost forgot a lot of people believe that Paris Hilton shouldnt sing,becoz she doesnt deserve that kind of attention.Phedophiles and child pornorgraphy are both serious issues ,i think as serious as the make overs people get on the Oprah show,now dont get me wrong, i simply adore Oprah.Long live Oprah for caring for the poor and helpless,and for pretending to care for stuck up people ,who cant seem to think beyond the fancy dream wedding and how to live life after divorce.
I am not claiming to be the most righteous person on the face of the earth ,take for example last night i was watching cnn and i was feeling sorry for the people of Iraq ,but i still couldnt help pondering as to why Shihab Ratansi was such a cutie.I am only human.As human beings its our duty to be selfish and we dont have any other choice,and hence the world will continue to be the hell hole it is.But frankly speaking i wish to sing what a wonderful world ,like louis armstrong.If only Nostradamus had predicted peace and not the third world war,then perhaps everyone will be striving towards that goal, coz we all have to be spoon fed everything.I am so proud of myself, that i am so concerned about the mankind,but sadly my mom is yelling at me for not making the bed so i have to end this article.Thanks a lot.

HOW TO AVOID VIKARMA

There are basically three types of karmas:

1. karma,viz actions that elevates us for doing righteous deeds.
2. vikarma, viz actions that degrades us for ill treating others.
3. and finally akarma, viz actions that liberates us.[neutral actions]

I think always doing the righteous thing is the sign of the super ego being over active.It means striving for perfection, this is also a waste of time and energy.Trying to be flawless is the biggest flaw in people.Such people will have a tough time listening to criticisms.Secondly, in my opinion the only way to avoid vikarma is by relieving ourselves from the concept of getting bothered by others.The easiest way to do so is by viewing others as an extension of ourselves.Try to see everybody as a part of you .Then, not minding their flaws will come to us naturally.We can again enlargen this concept further by thinking that the whole universe is a part of you.You are not only a part of the universe ,but you are everything.If you see yourself in everything ,how can you think of it in a negative way.You might view yourself also in a negative way, but still you will find it easier to live with it.

KARMA [WHAT GOES AROUND COMES AROUND]

Karma,is the most important aspect of each individuals journey through this world.Karma is the universal law of action causing reaction.Let us think and understand how karma works.Karma can occur as negative,positive or neutral life events.But our karma is solely the outcome of our judgement towards others.For example we might suddenly develop aversive feelings about someone.And as the days pass by wecount the persons mean behaviours according to our knowledge.But its a delusion, its all in our mind.Where will a person find time to plan and behave in a way just to annoy us .And this delusion atlast forces us to act out inorder to harm the object of our hatred.Thus , negativity is being spread due to our actions.Anything that happens after this incidence can be called karma or after karma.Its called our karma ,becoz not only is the other person disturbed, we are also disturbed by our actions.

THE SELF LOATHER

PROFOUND SADNESS,
I KNOW ITS MADNESS,
THE ROAD AHEAD IS SO BRIGHT,
AND THATS THE FRIGHT,
IN BRGHTNESS I SEE,
WHAT SURROUNDS ME,
THE FUTURE IS SO BLEAK,
AND THE AIR AROUND ME IS SO WEAK,
I KNOW I CANT HELP ME,
WHEN I KNOW THAT I HATE ME,
EVEN THOUGH I CANT TAKE THE ORDEAL,
THERE IS NO WAY TO OVERCOME THE WAY I FEEL.

A HEAD FULL OF NOTHING

Its been quite a while since i have written anything.And at the sametime ,i have been wondering what is wrong with me, why the hell cant i think of anything to write.God [oops no, not god i] knows that i can talk about nothing for hours at a stretch ,so how come even nothing is not coming to my head.I was getting angry at both the hemispheres of my head.And then after awhile i realized that its not a problem.We all, since the day that we are born we are thinking ,using our mind all the time ,without giving it a break.We are constantly using our mind ,both consciously and unconsciously.The only time we give it a rest is the day we die.But luckily for me i realized it before i died ,so i am happy that i gave my mind a break from mvblogosphere.But i am back again.

DAYS UNDER HYPNOTISM

Are there days when you wake up and start your day without being conscious of your actions?Or rather you are aware of what you are doing ,but you dont really care.Life is lived just for the heck of it and not becoz you are interested in living your life.Just do your duties becoz thats how its supposed to be ,and you dont give a damn.Days are just wasted to shorten the time.But should we really do it .I mean we live in this hell hole becoz there is no choice,its priorly written,so why not take advantage of it.We are just experiencing what is destined for us ,we are just watching our lives script being unfolded.But according to me we have the power to turn it around ,and edit all the parts we dont like.For example some people in this world had decided that we cant have sex without holding a certificate in our hands.But its their own freedom and choice, maybe those people are paper fetishists, they are not particularly fond of chastity.And we all like a bunch of idiots settled down for their rules .Rules are not good, rules are made so that it could be broken.sheeesh what a world this is.

PATHETIC MALDIVIAN MEN

Why do some ,no not some all maldivian romantic poets write funny verses when they are heart broken.I mean the way they arrange their words are so hilarious.I mean will a girl have eye balls made of ice .Or rather asses made of stone.But maldivian boys seems to meet girls with such features ,and even wierder features.I wonder why i have never met a guy with a **** made out of scoops finest ice cream flavour ,guess my bad luck, all you poets must be having features which if a person tries to describe will only end up sounding like a recipe of thai fish curry.HERE IS ME ATTEMPTING TO WRITE A POEM LIKE MY FELLOW COUNTRY MEN.
ONCE I MET A BOY,
I THINK HIS NAME WASNT ROY,
HIS OWL LIKE EYES LOOKED SO FUNNY,
HE HAD EARS OF A BUNNY,
AND THEN ONE DAY WE BROKE UP,
LIKEWISE THE SUN CAME UP,
AND NOW I PEE IN MY PANTS ,
WHEN I THINK OF WHAT HE DID USING HIS HANDS.

IMBALANCE OF THE HOMEOSTATIS

WHAT IF YOU HAD ALWAYS BELEIVED THAT YOU HAVE A CERTAIN DESTINY AND YOU WILL SEE THROUGH IT WITH EASE. THERE COMES A TIME WHEN YOU REALIZE YOUR DREAMS AND HOPES ,YOU TEND TO EXPECT SOME THINGS FROM YOURSELF AS WELL.YOU THINK ONE DAY YOU WILL LIVE LIFE THE WAY YOU WANT TO. AS YOU GROW OLDER AND THINGS DONT GO ACCORDING TO YOUR PLANS ,YOU TRY TO IGNORE ALL YOUR DISAPPOINTMENTS AND BE OPTIMISTIC.SO ONE FINE DAY YOU GO AROUND DOING THE NORMAL BORING STUFF THAT YOU DO,IT SUDDENLY HITS LIKE A THUNDER BOLT THAT YOUR DREAMS WILL NEVER BE FULFILLED.AND ALL YOUR SUPPOSED MATURITY WILL BE OF NO USE.I WONDER WHY ITS SO DIFFICULT TO DIGEST THAT YOUR NOT THAT DIFFERENT FROM OTHERS ,AND YOU ARE AS PLAIN AS THEM,AND WHATS MORE YOU ARE MORE TROUBLED THAN THE PEOPLE WHO DOESNT DARE TO DREAM.JUST TAKE A DEEP BREATHE AND THINK YOU NEVER GOT TO REACH YOUR IDEAL HEIGHT,OR LOOSE THE EXCESSIIVE WEIGHT THAT YOU CARRY AROUND,YOU ALSO COULDNT BE THE UGLY DUCKLING WHO BECAME THE BEAUTIFUL SWAN.YOU WILL ALWAYS BE YOU ,AND THATS SCARY AND THERE IS NO WAY TO CHANGE THAT.

LABELS

One of my fellow bloggers had asked me what my profession is.But i dont wanna answer that becoz,i am not fond of labels,labelling leads to fixations.Fixations of attitudes of people towards others and vice versa.Labels like lesbians,prostitutes,gays,muslims,jews and nigers are all made by human beings.And i think its becoz of these labels, that we have developed prejudice towards each other.Labels are the root cause for all problems.It makes us build an invisible wall and we keep strengthening these walls throughout our lives.Dont depend on labels.

ENLIGHTENMENT CONT........

I think we all are suffering from a huge syndrome.Its something like i wanna be different so i am gonna copy all the jackasses in the world.Like a few years ago in one neighbourhood a teenager commited suicide ,and the following couple of weeks a few dozen of youngsters did the same thing .Its called the copy cat effect.Just like that we are also trying to be like the other person.The other person might be hundred times more stupid than us .But do we care, no.We just under estimate who we are and we just carry on being like others.If i myself dont appreciate who i am then no one else will respect me.I am not just critisizing others ,i am talking about my self too.Even i like calling myself wierd,and i might not be wierd.But i also enjoy behaving like the people i see on TV.I am not doing it on purpose,its done unconsciously.But what to do the world is so confusing.We call ourselves civilized people,but are we going foward,or are we taking a huge leap backwards ,and that too not towards our past ,but towards a scarier place .And after reaching that point of no return ,we will regret being humans .We are all so messed up.WE ARE DAZED AND CONFUSED.

ENLIGHTENMENT

I NEVER UNDERSTOOD FULLY THE MEANING OF ENLIGHTENMENT.I MEAN WHAT ALL CHAGES WILL TAKE PLACE IN A PERSON AFTER HE BECOMES AN ENLIGHTENED PERSON.WILL HE BE FREE OF ALL THE WOLRDLY WORRIES?WILL HE NEVER GET ANGRY AT ANYONE, EVEN IF THAT PERSON IS THE NASTIEST PERSON ALIVE.I KNOW PEOPLE SAY THAT AFTER ENLIGHTENMENT,ONE WILL FEEL PEACEFUL.BUT I JUST WANT TO KNOW HOW IS IT POSSIBLE.TO BE FREE OF ALL HUMAN EMOTIONS EVEN IF ITS NEGATIVE EMOTIONS.OR IS IT A STAGE OF INSANITY?WELL,SUCH AN INSANITY IS BETTER THAN BEING NORMAL.BECAUSE FEELING GOOD ABOUT ONESELF IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN BEING NORMAL.I CANT WAIT TO BE ABNORMAL IN THAT CONTEXT.